Val Haderlie, Abundance Coach | Empowering Successful Entrepreneurs

I have been intrigued for a long time by a simple word which I first ran across in the New Testament of the Holy Bible: lovingkindness. According to various religions including Buddhaism, the Bah’ai faith, Christianity, and Hinduism the definition of the word combines actions and emotions encouraged by the spiritual teachers of the ages such as charity, compassion, understanding, gentleness, brotherhood, friendliness, esteem and Godly love.   Lovingkindness embodies the altruistic desire of wanting for others what we want for ourselves.

I recently listened to an interview with best-selling author, Marci Shimoff, a featured teacher in the movie “The Secret,” who is known for several “Chicken Soup for the Soul” books for women. Her book, “Happy for No Reason” is rocking the personal development world. One basic premise in her book is that “happy people let love lead in their lives.” During the interview, I was particularly impacted by a specific “happiness habit” referred to by Shimoff which she calls “lovingkindness.” Shimoff has taken this age-old word and applied it to one of the oldest stewardships in the world,  the practice of silently sending a blessing of happiness, ease, comfort, and peace to everyone around you.

Through the ages, many religions and cultures have employed the practice of sending silent blessings to friends and enemies alike. In ancient Hawaii, the practice of Ho’oponopono carried with it this benediction:  “ I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”  Far Eastern practices include giving a gift to everyone we meet, a gift that may be as small as a flower, a compliment, or a prayer.   A silent blessing of Western culture  quoted by Shimoff is: “May you be safe. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you live with ease.” 

It goes without saying that when we act with kindness, generosity, unselfishness, tenderness or forbearance, a change takes place in our own hearts. These actions expand our ability to understand another person’s feelings or desires and to empathize with their needs. In general, however, we reserve these responses for those we love or admire. 

It is when we expand our vision and become more confident of our own self-worth that we see the value of others and begin to desire their welfare and happiness. The practice of wishing well-being to ourselves and to others not only increases our own feelings of deservability but it also allows us to acknowledge goodness in those around us, even those we don’t know. This acknowledgement of goodness then leads to the reciprocation of compassion and our wish for others literally comes back to bless us. The sending of silent blessings becomes a catalyst for the cycle of appreciation, abundance, and joy among people and opens doors for positive interactions and relationships.

There is a link between wishing others well and creating miracles in our lives. Once in a while, there is a co-worker, a family member, a school teacher, or a neighbor whose actions or words hurt or offend us. Sometimes, we come in contact during the course of our daily activities with a person whose attitude is negative or whose demeanor is repulsive. There are lots of ways we can avoid interaction with these people, but the result of avoidance is continued rancor. Silently sending a blessing or extending a courtesy changes the complexion of the relationship in subtle ways. Acts of compassion no matter how small bring joy to both the giver and the receiver. Ironically, and even miraculously, the one who was earlier offended but who blesses his foe often receives the most benefit.

Happiness is the byproduct of right action and, as noted in the Bible, lovingkindness expressed without reservation is definitive right action. Such happiness opens the way for a myriad of miracles in our lives, not the least of which are the miracles of forgiveness, connection, relationships, and belonging.

 

 

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